First the whining…
Things have just been hectic for over a month now with Hubby having to stay back late everyday and work weekends and I come home with Chutku by the office bus. Though I have informed the team and the manager that I would be working from 8am to 5pm and take the 5.15pm bus, the team gives me anything for review only by 4.45/5 in the evening just as I take my bag and start ” You’re leaving? What about my code review/doc review then?” They ask. So invariably there are “not so good vibes” going around at the work place.
As for the home front – (the lesser said the better, but I always talk more na?;-) ) So things are hectic with the maid absconding every other day, the cook spilling oil all over the stove and the floor at 6.30 in the morning and refusing to clean it up. She said she will get late for the next house and wiped all the oil with a tissue and just left! :-O I had to again wipe it all up in fear that one of us might have a nasty fall – especially the little fellow. And then last week there was some issue which needed my clarification at work and I got a call from office as soon as I reached home. The milkman hadnt come that morning and I had bought milk on the way back which needed to be put in the fridge. So, there I was with phone in 1 hand, milk packet in the other to be kept inside and within a fraction of a second Chuktu squeezed in between me and the fridge door,grabbed at a big glass full of milk and… you can imagine the kitchen floor and him. I was totally lost. I first told my manager I will call back, removed the little fellow’s wet clothes, trapped him in the high chair and it took me 30mins to clean up the kitchen floor 2 times with water 😦 So these are the days right now… And it all hit me like a ton of bricks a couple of days back when I get a call again from the manager (after I’ve updated everything to him and left) for some issue that did not really need me and then he said “You are not available”. That snapped something and I felt let down – mostly by myself – wondering how is it that everyone else is able to manage their careers and homes so wonderfully when I cant handle it for even a couple of months. I always thought myself to be very strong – emotionally and mentally.
Now for the small silver linings.
# Hubby saw the effect of all this on me (I broke down on monday) and told me “Lets go on a holiday,so think about it when you feel low 🙂 ‘. Yaay! I know, I KNOW that it will be another month or so before things settle down at work for him and we can even go for a weekend. BUT I have a holiday to plan that will ease my mind AND I can look forward to some nice relaxed days. So, does anyone have any suggestions for 3 day outings from Blore which is also child friendly?
# Since last tuesday until yesterday I had conversations with 3 friends who are all having their own problems. And after talking to me they all said it made them feel better.1 of them pinged me on communicator later:
“R, my heart became lighter,I felt so bad on my meeting..poor guy my husband listened all my scrap stories and said OK..leave it..if not interested leave the job…so my feelings of badness doubled..but speaking to a person travelling in same boat will lighter my feelings…I realized it today.thank you “
And another mailed me:
“Feeling lil relaxed after talking to you. Was so full since morning and worst part is I cant share anything wid my parents also. Tdy whatever we did chit-chat had no conclusion or outcome, still feeling ok today. Was almost dead bfr that. Thanks a lot. U being my friend is gr8 support, this is second time when u really pricked my pain and m reliefed. My C-section became very managable cause ur words were very powerful and encouraging then too. Ur words give power to survive when suffering. Thanks again. Really love u this time.“
Not that I did anything – I only heard them out… But these are my silver lining that gives me some satisfaction and peace that I have been of some help to someone today…