I have a cousin’s wedding coming up in a couple of weeks and I was discussing the plans of when and where to meet and such. I mentioned to an aunt that I wanted to go to the parlour for the wedding reception and that hubby would be dropping me off at the parlour and picking me back up. And she was shocked.She said you ask him to take you to the parlour?! Like I was doing some grave mistake! Yes! My hubby does take me to the parlour and will come back to pick me up if I have to wait or will even wait for like say 10 mins out there if I can get out by then. And I’ve seen a lot of husbands doing that too… Waiting patiently outside for an hour or so, listening to music in the car for their wife to come out… and I’ve also seen the smile on the husband’s face when the wife comes out with maybe a new haircut, noticed the wife preening and showing off and heard them discuss that new haircut – when did i notice so much? Well – when I waited for my hubby to pick me up from the parlour -ofcourse! Do I do that?-Yes I do- before I show my new haircut to anyone else-I would want his opinion -the only one that actually matters-so whats wrong if I discuss my new haircut with him or he picks me up from a parlour- If I dont tell him i went to the parlour – does it mean he never notices ‘the whatever’ change in me?!! Please! Its NOT a crime to ask your husband to take you to the parlour!
When something as small as this is an issue – I wonder what people are going to tell if I say I want my husband with me when I deliver my baby! (Whenever thats gonna be!) Many of my friends have had babies in the last 1-1.5 years. And every one of them said that they didnt have their hubbys with them. My question to them has always been – didnt you want him to be there? Though they personally did, they were told by the elders not to let the man in as its not a very comfortable thing. Obviously it isnt,and the hubby will be well aware of it-wouldnt it give the mother some moral support if her hubby is in there-supporting her through all that pain? I for one am going to put up all the fight I have to – just to have him there- to experience it along with me! Well whats wrong with it? And yes I would want him to be the first to carry our baby too – irrespective of how many elders are there waiting… even before either of the grandparents get a chance- well-its OUR baby – and its his right to carry the baby! And I’ve asked this too – If he’s not in there with you then havent the mothers felt that the baby’s dad has to hold the little one first? And another thing I’ve hear -the new dad doesnt know how to carry the baby – what if he carries it clumsily and hurts the baby! What the hell!Its not like the dad is irresponsible -its HIS baby he’s going to carry-dont tell me he’s going do anything to harm it infact he’s probably going to be more careful since he’s as worried as anyone else to not cause it any harm! And well-high time he starts to learn!
But,Im so glad that most men I’ve met recently have no qualms about dropping/picking up their wife from the parlour or waiting out for them. And also am glad that they take complete interest in their pregnant wife and want to be a part of the process including during the delivery – which is a refreshing change from the previous generation – say Dad and Dad-in-law who obviously had nothing to do with their wife going to the parlour and as for a baby – hmmm, the less said the better…Let the tribe of such men increase!
Hmmm, this sounds like a stupid rant but I had to get it out of my system.Especially both of these discussions happened in such close succession that it got to me.